Cognitive Behavioral Strategies

Lynne S. Gots, Ph.D.
Licensed Psychologist

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How to Get Motivated in One Second or Less

By Lynne Gots, posted on March 9th, 2012.

Have you ever noticed how many self-improvement plans involve numbers? Here’s what I mean:

  • The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
  • The One Minute Manager
  • The 4-Hour Workweek
  • The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous
  • 8 Steps to Happiness
  • 8 Weeks to Optimum Health
  • The Eight Essential Steps to Conflict Resolution
  • Get a Grip: Your Two Week Mental Makeover
  • Fit Soul, Fit Body: 9 Keys to a Healthier, Happier You
  • The Great Fitness Experiment: One Year of Trying Everything
  • 21-Day Weight Loss Kickstart
  • 21 Days to Improve Your Job Search
  • 7 Steps to a Pain-Free Life
  • The 8-Week Cholesterol Cure
  • Now What?: 90 Days to a New Life Direction
  • Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love
  • How to Get a Great Job in 90 Days or Less
  • I Don’t Want a Divorce: A 90 Day Guide to Saving Your Marriage
  • 100 Things to Do Before You Die
  • 101 Things to Do Before You Die
  • 1,000 Places to See Before You Die

These are all real books. Some have been blockbuster bestsellers; others, well . . .

Now I’ll offer my own temporal tip. You can get motivated and make up for the hour lost to the return of Daylight Savings Time this weekend in ONE SECOND OR LESS by following my One-Second Plan A or my No-Seconds Plan B. Both are effective, but Plan B is faster.

Plan A: Turn off the computer.

Plan B: Don’t turn on the computer.

Sound too good to be true? If you doubt me, test it out for yourself. I tried Plan B a few weeks ago when I had company coming and needed to get the house cleaned in a hurry. Instead of letting emails and Facebook status updates swallow up the morning, I dashed around throwing out newspapers, vacuuming up dog hair, fluffing towels, spritzing bathroom fixtures and Swiffering floors. I was done before noon and still had plenty of time to take the dogs out for a long walk and relax with the Sunday crossword before the guests arrived.

In the interest of submitting my technique to rigorous scientific scrutiny, I did a second experiment the following week. I controlled for treatment variables, using Plan A this time. But the results weren’t as favorable due to one critical flaw in my methodology: my directions were ambiguous.

Instead of instructing myself to turn off the computer, I said: Don’t sit down at the computer.

And I didn’t. Instead I stood, hunched over the laptop on the kitchen counter, while I answered “just one” email, then another, then read “just one” blog, then another . . . Until, an hour later, I tore myself away to go fold the pile of clothes on my closet floor. But my back was in such a spasm from my contortions over the keyboard that I couldn’t bend down.

This Sunday I’ll be following the revised version of Plan A.




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Social Anxiety: Exposure Exercises to Try at Home

By Lynne Gots, posted on March 8th, 2012.

In a cognitive therapy workshop I once attended, Dr. David Burns, author of the classic, The Feeling Good Handbook, described an exposure session he’d had with a patient he was treating for social anxiety.

They’d walked from his office at the University of Pennsylvania to the food trucks in front of the quad and plopped themselves down on the sidewalk, lying with arms outstretched and eyes closed in the middle of the throngs queuing up to buy lunch.

Such an act of brazen disregard for social convention would be very hard to execute—and not just for the person being treated. As much as I admire Dr. Burns’ chutzpah and creative flair, I could never emulate it.

The closest I’ve come to assisting with an exposure that posed the risk of police intervention occurred shortly after 9/11, when I accompanied a patient with a pigeon phobia to several places in DC where the birds like to roost. They particularly favor the roof of the Air and Space Museum on the National Mall, and thus we ended up there, staring and pointing skyward for long enough to arouse suspicion. Judging from how the guards were eyeing us, I’m guessing we looked liked snipers scoping out sight lines to the Capitol.

A good exposure exercise gets at the heart of a person’s fear.  While the situations will vary for different individuals, the core worry in social anxiety disorder, regardless of the circumstances triggering it, is of being scrutinized unfavorably by others and feeling embarrassed or humiliated.

Creating a public spectacle would be a very advanced exposure skill, and I wouldn’t recommend trying it on your own. But there are many less dramatic ways to challenge social anxiety in the comfort and privacy of your own home.

I’ve compiled a few examples from my clinical files. Hats off to the brave patients who came up with these ideas and were actually willing to try them!

  • Friend a casual acquaintance on Facebook
  • Accept a friend request from someone you don’t know well
  • Email a professor with a question about an assignment
  • “Like” a controversial topic on Facebook
  • Send an email without proofreading it
  • Send an email with an intentional misspelling or grammatical error
  • Post a comment anonymously
  • Post a comment using your real first name

Work your way through these exposures and you may, in time, find yourself standing to the left on a Metro escalator or, better yet, lying down on the platform during rush hour.  Just don’t ask me to join you.

 




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This blog is intended solely for the purpose of entertainment and education. All remarks are meant as general information and should not be taken as personal diagnostic or therapeutic advice. If you choose to comment on a post, please do not include any information that could identify you as a patient or potential patient. Also, please refrain from making any testimonials about me or my practice, as my professional code of ethics does not permit me to publish such statements. Comments that I deem inappropriate for this forum will not be published.

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If you don't receive a response to an email from Dr. Gots in 48 hours, please call the office and leave a voicemail message.

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