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Why Telling Someone with OCD to “Trust Your Gut” is Bad Advice

By Lynne Gots, posted on August 19th, 2019.

The idea of making a decision based on a “gut instinct,” or intuition, may have some theoretical merit but for someone with OCD, it’s like kryptonite.   

Neuroscientists have constructed complex processing theories to explain the concept of “just knowing,” or intuition. Our brains are like computers, constantly comparing new sensory information and events with memories of past experiences and stored knowledge to come up with predictions of what will happen next. This process occurs so quickly and subconsciously that we’re not aware it’s happening—hence, the idea of a gut feeling. The opposite of intuition is methodical analytical thinking. Both can be helpful, depending on the situation. But people with OCD tend to overanalyze decisions, while also falling prey to emotional—typically, anxious—reasoning. The result? Uncertainty and decision-making paralysis.

One common OCD worry is whether a relationship is “right.” Typical obsessive questions include: “Do I feel love for my partner?” “Do we share enough in common?” “ What if my feelings change?” “How can I be sure I want to be in this relationship?” Constant analysis—compulsive checking for the elusive, correct emotional reaction, seeking reassurance from relationship websites and forums, asking friends and family for advice—doesn’t resolve the doubt and causes more anxiety, making it impossible to experience a rewarding emotional connection.

A site dedicated to forming healthy relationships describes a gut instinct as “your immediate understanding of something,” requiring “no need to think it over or get another opinion—you just know” [italics mine].

This type of popular wisdom—the idea that you can “just know”–adds to the distress many people with OCD experience in the face of major life decisions—not only about whether to get married or divorced, but also about whether to have children, go to graduate school, change jobs, or buy a house. OCD makes it virtually impossible to trust your gut because one of its major cognitive manifestations is doubt. It’s more likely to kick you in the gut and overwhelm you with incessant questions about your choices than to allow for intuition to help you.

So if you have OCD, don’t expect a feeling to inform your decisions. Rely, instead, on analysis (but not too much), experience, values, and common sense to guide you. And make room for a healthy measure of uncertaintly about the choices you ultimately make.



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This blog is intended solely for the purpose of entertainment and education. All remarks are meant as general information and should not be taken as personal diagnostic or therapeutic advice. If you choose to comment on a post, please do not include any information that could identify you as a patient or potential patient. Also, please refrain from making any testimonials about me or my practice, as my professional code of ethics does not permit me to publish such statements. Comments that I deem inappropriate for this forum will not be published.

Contact Dr. Gots

202-331-1566

2440 M Street, NW
Suite 710
Washington, DC 20037

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If you don't receive a response to an email from Dr. Gots in 48 hours, please call the office and leave a voicemail message.

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